NEIL: I can't believe 2010 is coming to an end. This was the best year I've ever had.

MR. WIGGLES: But isn't this the year you were dumped seventeen times, kidnapped by Somali pirates, and pissed on by a rodeo clown?

NEIL: Yes, but this year my girlfriends weren't imaginary, my parents actually paid the ransom, and the clown didn't make me drink it.

MR. WIGGLES: You're sad.

NEIL: If a rabid Dalmatian doesn't bite off my other testicle in the next few days, 2010 will have been the Year of Neil!